Dale Carnegie’s book isn’t a sales manual, but it may as well be. If you want to excel at selling, whether it’s a product, service, or an idea, people skills are your biggest asset. Here are 10 timeless lessons from the book that can help you become a better salesperson and someone people trust, remember, and agree with.
1. Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain
Criticism puts people on the defensive. It hurts their ego and damages trust. Instead of blaming others, try to understand their perspective. Ask yourself, “Why might they think or act this way?” When people feel understood, they become more open and less resistant.
2. Offer sincere appreciation
People crave recognition. A genuine compliment can create more goodwill than any discount. Notice what they’ve done well and appreciate their effort or insight. Real praise makes people feel recognized, and those who feel recognized tend to stay.
3. Show genuine interest
Want people to care about what you’re offering? Show them you care first. Ask questions, listen closely, and engage with their world. When people sense your interest is real and not just about the sale, they open up. That’s when genuine conversations and conversions begin.
4. Smile
A simple smile can instantly change the mood of a conversation. It shows warmth, confidence, and friendliness. Whether in person or online, smiling makes people feel more comfortable with you, and people buy from those they feel at ease with.
5. Remember their name
Using someone’s name is a small gesture that makes a big difference. It personalizes your conversation and shows you care. Forgetting their name can quickly create awkwardness. Always make the effort to remember it.
6. Make it about them
The best sales conversations aren’t one-sided. They involve exploration. Listen more than you talk. Let them share their story, challenges, and goals. When they feel heard, they naturally become more open to what you have to say.
7. Avoid arguments
You can’t win an argument and a customer at the same time. Even if you “win,” the other person often leaves feeling defeated. That’s not a win for either side. Instead, agree where you can and gently guide the conversation toward a shared solution.
8. Admit your mistakes quickly
Own your mistakes without hesitation. Whether it’s a missed follow-up or an error in details, being honest builds credibility. People respect vulnerability, and that can create the groundwork for long-term trust.
9. Ask instead of ordering
No one likes being told what to do. Instead of saying, “You need to do this,” try, “Would it help if we did it this way?” This invites collaboration and reduces friction. When people feel they have a choice, they’re more likely to say yes.
10. Begin on common ground
Disagreements become easier to handle when you start with agreement. Find shared goals, mutual interests, or common challenges. Once that connection is established, it’s much simpler to navigate differences without losing rapport.
Final thought
Sales is not just about what you’re selling; it’s about who you are while selling it. Build trust, create connections, and make people feel good about doing business with you. That’s how you win friends and influence buyers.
